


Logical Proceedings

by AndreaLyn



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-08
Updated: 2014-11-08
Packaged: 2018-02-24 14:36:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2584913
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AndreaLyn/pseuds/AndreaLyn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Spock has noticed that the Captain and Doctor have mutual feelings and finds it illogical. Hence, the most suitable course of action is the making of matches.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Logical Proceedings

This had been continuing for approximately three years, seven months, two days, four hours, fifty-six minutes and seventeen seconds according to Spock’s calculations of the events and the triggered causes of such behaviour of the Captain in regards to the Doctor. Perhaps it had not been wise to glean the existence of returned intentions from the Doctor using the metaphorical stallion conversation, but he had deduced that the feelings involved in the situation were reciprocated on both sides.  
  
And yet, none of the typical human courting rituals were being initiated. He shared this information with Uhura as they settled for the evening’s meal. “I find it fascinating,” Spock remarked and was in genuine curiosity of the events. “They are both under the thrall of what humans might call affection for each other and yet, neither do anything about it. They actively choose to pine for the other though their feelings are, quite obviously, mutual.”  
  
Uhura pressed a soft kiss of affection to his hands – causing a very logical reaction in Spock’s physiological state – and smiled fondly up at him. “I would tell you that love isn’t logical, but the truth is that Jim Kirk and Leonard McCoy are idiots and they’re both too scared, stubborn, and terrified to say anything. Before the Enterprise and even now, they were and are each others’ best friend. Would you want to lose that?”  
  
Spock still found it very curious as logically, a male or female should not allow feelings of desire to be fully repressed lest damage be done to their physical being.  
  
“Still, it is most illogical. I will strive to fix it.”  
  
Uhura stared at him for a long moment.  
  
“...how?”  
  
“I shall merely capitalize on my position as the Captain’s First Officer and my role in Doctor McCoy’s daily tasks and make the other aware of their burgeoning and trifling human emotions for each other.” It seemed perfectly natural as he spoke it aloud and he could see no true issue with it.   
  
Spock found it strange, then, that rather than Uhura reacting with annoyance (as there had been a seventy-two-point-three chance of such a reaction in this situation), she merely smiled warmly at him and caused a strange warmth blossoming in his stomach that he attributed to his half-human side.   
  
She clasped his hand and smoothly rubbed her thumb over the junction of each knuckle and finger. “I think you’d be a very good friend to do so.” And then her warm smile became troubling and mischievous. “I’ll help.”  
  
*  
  
Jim didn’t think that he’d left his room with dinner, candles, and music playing. He was also  _pretty sure_  that he hadn’t asked Bones to turn up in jeans and that turtle-neck of his (Bones swore it still reeked of the shuttle and Jim always just affectionately told him he was utterly batshit insane). It’s not that he doesn’t like the view, but it’s just that...  
  
“Um.”  
  
“Jim?”  
  
“Wow,” Jim finished with a broad grin, stunned as to what the hell was going on and it wasn’t even his birthday (although if it had been, he’d like to think that Bones would be there absolutely naked with a giant red bow awaiting Jim’s unwrapping fingers). He slowly sat down in a seat and ignored the tumbling feelings in his stomach as he stared fondly at Bones. “You did all this for me?”  
  
“You?  _You_  sent me a message saying we had to talk and you had something ready for  _me_.”  
  
They both stared at each other for a very long moment before Jim was vaulting out of his seat and storming to the door. “Computer, list all known entrants into this quarters in the last twenty-fours. With printed accompaniment, please.” Jim really didn’t know what to make of the fact that everything had been suspiciously wiped clean in the last little while. He glanced over his shoulder to see Bones tucking into the soup on the table with mild enthusiasm. “Hey!” he protested.  
  
“Just because someone shoved us in a room together doesn’t mean I’m not going to enjoy waiting, warm food,” Bones felt inclined to point out. His eyes were still on Jim and Jim was trying his best not to get overwhelmed by the fact that they could talk and they could eat and Jim could tell Bones ‘oh and hey, so, no one’s ever been there for me like you have and I’m pretty sure you call it Stockholm Syndrome, but I love you’. Or maybe he could just go with the ‘Me Jim, you Bones, us fuck’ route and let his body do the talking for him when he stripped down to nothing. Instead, he sits down and slouches forward, grateful for the touch when Bones pushes at his shoulder to get him to sit up straight. “You don’t need to be the Hunchback of Starfleet, Jim. Sit up.”  
  
“Yes, dear,” Jim mockingly replied as he made for the salad and smirked at Bones. “How was your day, honey? Did the kids behave?”  
  
“You’re a reprobate, Jim, let me eat in silence and forget about the fact that people lied to get us in the same room in my good clothes, with romantic lighting, and with food that’s got aphrodisiacs in it. Oysters, chocolate, champagne and...well, I don’t want to know what’s under that domed plate.”  
  
Jim was leaning his chin on his palm as he stared at Bones over the candlelight. “Chekov, Spock, Uhura, Sulu.”  
  
“What?”  
  
“The four of them have access codes to both my door and to the system that would let them fix it so that all logs of who had entered would be erased. The thought that went into this food screams Sulu or Uhura to me, but the tech-job sounds like Chekov or Spock.” Jim had steepled his fingers now and was enjoying his dive into the depths of mystery-solving. He glanced up for a moment to watch the way Bones was sucking an oyster out of its shell and let out a whimper of a noise.  
  
That seemed to get Bones’ suspicion and he looked up warily. “Jim?”  
  
“Yes?”  
  
“You sound like a yelping puppy. What the hell is going on?”  
  
“You’re the one fellating an oyster!” Jim let out a huff and slumped back in his chair, ignoring Bones’ little annoyed noise that was probably about his posture ( _again_ ). “Someone made it so that we would be in a room with all this romantic stuff and probably meant for me to tell you something, but why are you here, Bones?”  
  
Bones shifted uncomfortably and Jim stared at him suspiciously, wondering why his blunt friend would choose now of all moments to get slightly antsy.   
  
“Bones?” Jim’s suspicion was starting to grow to the point that it was a niggling itch at the back of his mind that really wasn’t going to go away. “Why did you come here in your best jeans and in a shirt that reminds us of our first meeting?” Suspicion was trying to give way to hope and Jim was doing his best not to let it because if hope happened and he was wrong, he was due for a miserable moment or four. “Leonard McCoy, what aren’t you telling me? Why would you stay when you saw the romantic...oh my god,” Jim finished, breath drawn in on the inhale as he let hope take over because fuck suspicion, hope was so much better.  
  
Bones was still shifting uncomfortably, but Jim might as well be a telepath because he sees it all.  
  
“Really?”  
  
“Sometimes I wish you weren’t a genius so I could slip this crap past you,” Bones was muttering, but he was still on his feet and leaning down to kiss Jim firmly and fully on the lips. Jim leaned up into it thoughtfully and closed his eyes as Bones pressed his forehead to Jim’s. “Yeah, so I’m a little...you know.”  
  
“Yeah, me too,” Jim exhaled giddily.  
  
“Someone still set us up.”  
  
“Oh, we’ll get them back for that,” Jim assured with a broad grin.  
  
*  
  
Spock closed the door behind him, lips twitching ever so imperceptibly in discontent. It took a full moment for Uhura to join him in the turbolift and her scowl was far more indicative of his emotions upon the situation.   
  
“You were the one who wanted that result,” she pointed out.   
  
“I did not expect the Captain and Doctor to engage in such active tongue-play and affectionate name-calling in the vein of ‘my cutesy-wootsy bestest Doctor, I wuv you’ so early in the relationship. It is illogical at best and greatly irritating to other humans at worst.”  
  
“Well,” Uhura sighed. “At least no one seemed that put off.”  
  
“I do find it yet strange that we were not fully able to proceed with our romantic inclinations and yet they are together,” Spock noted.  
  
“And it was odd how blissful Chekov looked,” Uhura added.  
  
They arrived at the same conclusion instantaneously. They spared a moment’s bonded thought to exchange it with other before proceeding to think about all the plans they would have to dissemble as they were now for useless cause seeing that the Captain and the Doctor had found their way together through the meddling of others.  
  
“Humans remain fascinating,” Spock noted as they stepped out of the turbolift to go to McCoy’s quarters and take apart the bondage materials they had set up. He did not spare a moment to think about Uhura’s general feeling that such a word was not applicable when they were involved in the collecting of bondage materials, but Spock would like to think that his t’hy’la would admit that it was, in the very least,  _interesting_. 


End file.
